Welcome! This is a personal blog where I reflect on life, Judaism and my healing from an abusive childhood (including incest and other forms of abuse) and a bit of politics. If you are a victim/ survivor/ thriver, or a friend/ significant other/ spouse/ partner of one, or if you are looking for more information, read and comment below. I began this blog in June of 2003 when I was looking for a place to speak out and I found a community of friends and support. Come on in, ya'll.
Friday, August 03, 2007
Another blog by a Jewish incest survivor
Chaplain Bonnie has a newly revived blog where she is posting on being a Jewish survivor of incest. Her early posts are poignant. Read here at Jewish Family Incest Healing.
Ahh, so good to hear from you and I will have to send you an email to update you on where I ended up. My path took some different (but GREAT!) turns and I'll have to tell you the details soon!
You've been in my thoughts and we'll touch base soon.
SOOO good to hear from you and I'll have to email you with all the twists and turns of where I ended up. It's great and I'm settling well - still in boxes at 1am.
You've been in my thoughts and we'll touch base soon!
My name's Michael Schulman. As some of you know - from seeing a trailer - I'm currently filming a documentary on sexual abuse in the Jewish community entitled Without A Voice.
I started this film at the end of 2005. It's taken almost three years to get the film to the development stage with a production company with the hopes of getting funding for the feature. However, the one concern is - will we be able to get survivors who are willing to show their face and talk on camera? That's only a question you (the survivors) can answer.
Out of all the people who come to this blog and others who are victims, lawyers, or supporters there must be at least a few who would be willing to show their face and get their story out there. I'm looking for those few. Please anyone who knows anyone - let them know about this project.
Of-course if you are a survivor and would like to talk without your face being seen whether shadowed or blurred out - that is also needed and will be considered.
This project is what we all need. It will have the power to create awareness and change that is so desperately needed in the community. I hope it will not take another three years to see this film to fruition. With your help we can speed up the process.
So, if you are interested or you know anyone who might be please email me ASAP at film2write@yahoo.com (subject - Without A Voice).
You can be from NY,LA, ISRAEL,CANADA - it doesn't matter the producers need to know you survivors exist - and once they do we can get the funding to get to you and get your story out.
Also, questions and concerns about the project will be answered promptly and available will be - resume/bio, trailers, written proposals, production company bio etc. for you to read and be comfortable with who you're talking and possibly working with in the future.
Sincerely and respectively, Michael Schulman film2write@yahoo.com
Also note-other noted figures within the "inner circle" have already been interviewed including Rabbi Blau, Rabbi Dratch, Elliot Pasik, and Robert Kolker
I am relieved to find blogs by other Jewish child abuse survivors. After struggling for many years, I have finally worked my way up to the point where I have admitted on my blog I am a survivor of child abuse and incest. It helps to know there are others out there, speaking up. Thank you.
A High Holy Day Ritual Suggestion: I too am a jewish incest survivor. It is nearly Rosh Hashanah and in my family tradition (like others) we visit the cemetary. Typically one leaves a stone to mark a visit to a loved one's grave. My ritual since my abuser (Uncle) died seven years ago has been to completely cover his flat grave stone in our family plot--I mean to completely cover his name and dates. I encourage others to use this ritual. I believe it is strongly in keeping with key tenets of Judaism.
We are told in Deuteronomy 25:17-19, "Remember what Amalek did to you on your journey, after you left Egypt--how, undeterred by fear of G-d, he surprised you on the march, when you were famished and weary, and cut down all the stragglers in your rear. Therefore, when the Lord your G-d grants you safety from all your enemies around you...you shall blot out the memory of Amalek from under heaven. Do not forget."
We are obligated to remember but we are also obligated to blot out the names of Amalek and all his offspring. Individuals like my Uncle and others who molest children are descendants of Amalek.
Finally, in ancient Israel certain individuals were stoned to death for violating community standards. And later Kabbalists and others believed in weighting down graves with stones so the souls of evil individuals could not rise to terrorize again.
I went to the cemetary yesterday. It is almost Rosh Hashanah after all.
I have just found this site. I am still in the victim stage of my incest. There seems to be no way out. My life has deteriorated in the last 20 years and my family was in denial. I now have siblings I do not speak to and do not belive this happened to me by my Dad.
I know it is not easy to move on, but I admire you Leah for your spirit in moving on after surviving such an abusive childhood. Keep on living life with hope.
12 comments:
Leah,
I'm glad I found your blog--I'll be adding a link on mine.
Ahh, so good to hear from you and I will have to send you an email to update you on where I ended up. My path took some different (but GREAT!) turns and I'll have to tell you the details soon!
You've been in my thoughts and we'll touch base soon.
Take good care!
SOOO good to hear from you and I'll have to email you with all the twists and turns of where I ended up. It's great and I'm settling well - still in boxes at 1am.
You've been in my thoughts and we'll touch base soon!
Take good care.
I think you would be interested in reading this article
http://jewishsurvivors.blogspot.com/2007/09/when-youre-incest-survivor-and-windows_26.html
Hi,
My name's Michael Schulman. As some of you know - from seeing a trailer - I'm currently filming a documentary on sexual abuse in the Jewish community entitled Without A Voice.
I started this film at the end of 2005. It's taken almost three years to get the film to the development stage with a production company with the hopes of getting funding for the feature. However, the one concern is - will we be able to get survivors who are willing to show their face and talk on camera? That's only a question you (the survivors) can answer.
Out of all the people who come to this blog and others who are victims, lawyers, or supporters there must be at least a few who would be willing to show their face and get their story out there. I'm looking for those few. Please anyone who knows anyone - let them know about this project.
Of-course if you are a survivor and would like to talk without your face being seen whether shadowed or blurred out - that is also needed and will be considered.
This project is what we all need. It will have the power to create awareness and change that is so desperately needed in the community. I hope it will not take another three years to see this film to fruition. With your help we can speed up the process.
So, if you are interested or you know anyone who might be please email me ASAP at
film2write@yahoo.com (subject - Without A Voice).
You can be from NY,LA, ISRAEL,CANADA - it doesn't matter the producers need to know you survivors exist - and once they do we can get the funding to get to you and get your story out.
Also, questions and concerns about the project will be answered promptly and available will be - resume/bio, trailers, written proposals, production company bio etc. for you to read and be comfortable with who you're talking and possibly working with in the future.
Sincerely and respectively,
Michael Schulman
film2write@yahoo.com
Also note-other noted figures within the "inner circle" have already been interviewed including Rabbi Blau, Rabbi Dratch, Elliot Pasik, and Robert Kolker
I am relieved to find blogs by other Jewish child abuse survivors. After struggling for many years, I have finally worked my way up to the point where I have admitted on my blog I am a survivor of child abuse and incest. It helps to know there are others out there, speaking up. Thank you.
Rivka,
Congratulations on being able to say the words. It is a big step and leads to other moments of strength.
We are (unfortunately) a large community of survivors and are here for each other.
You are always welcome to post or email.
Sending you strength,
Leah
A High Holy Day Ritual Suggestion:
I too am a jewish incest survivor. It is nearly Rosh Hashanah and in my family tradition (like others) we visit the cemetary. Typically one leaves a stone to mark a visit to a loved one's grave. My ritual since my abuser (Uncle) died seven years ago has been to completely cover his flat grave stone in our family plot--I mean to completely cover his name and dates. I encourage others to use this ritual. I believe it is strongly in keeping with key tenets of Judaism.
We are told in Deuteronomy 25:17-19, "Remember what Amalek did to you on your journey, after you left Egypt--how, undeterred by fear of G-d, he surprised you on the march, when you were famished and weary, and cut down all the stragglers in your rear. Therefore, when the Lord your G-d grants you safety from all your enemies around you...you shall blot out the memory of Amalek from under heaven. Do not forget."
We are obligated to remember but we are also obligated to blot out the names of Amalek and all his offspring. Individuals like my Uncle and others who molest children are descendants of Amalek.
Finally, in ancient Israel certain individuals were stoned to death for violating community standards. And later Kabbalists and others believed in weighting down graves with stones so the souls of evil individuals could not rise to terrorize again.
I went to the cemetary yesterday. It is almost Rosh Hashanah after all.
Nechabasha_in_Boston,
Wonderful idea. I hope that the day that you go will be a day of strength, courage, and celebration of survivorship!
Leah
(PS) - I have tried going to your blog and not seen any posts. I'll keep trying.
I have just found this site. I am still in the victim stage of my incest. There seems to be no way out. My life has deteriorated in the last 20 years and my family was in denial. I now have siblings I do not speak to and do not belive this happened to me by my Dad.
I am greatful I have found a jewish site to blog.
I know it is not easy to move on, but I admire you Leah for your spirit in moving on after surviving such an abusive childhood. Keep on living life with hope.
http://feelbettercenter.com/
elizbeck.blogspot.com
"Living with Memories"
my blog about surviving incest, rape and domestic violence
peace
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